Yearly Wrap

2025 was one of my better reading years - opened many, with over 70 books finished across a mix of authors, ages, geography and genres. Happy :). 

Little to add after the last post, just a couple of points.

• Some of the best discoveries included Halldor Laxness, and Patrick White. To read more from both of them over time. I also enjoyed The Bridge on Drina by Ivo Andric. And Thomas Hardy, his Far from The Madding Crowd was a beautiful read. And Kim. .
• Finally finished reading The Brothers Karamazov after so many starts! Yay for that! Between this and the Idiot, I prefer the Idiot. But quite like reading Dostovesky. The other challenge is to read Crime and Punishment. Demons. and a few other of his novels. But the dark undertones sometimes deter me.

Here's to 2026 and more reading!

*

List of 2025 finished reads below:

1. Acts of Worship by Yukio Mishima (SS)
2. The Rainbow by Yasunari Kawabata
3. Spring Snow by Yukio Mishima (The Sea of Fertility - Part 1)
4. Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop by Hwang Bo-Reumn (A day well spent is a life well lived)
5. The Master of Go by Yasunari Kawabata
6. Orbital by Samantha Harvey
7. The Bridge on the Drina by Ivo Andric (loved it *)
8. Kokoro by Soseki Natsume
9. A Bookshop in Algiers by Kaouther Adimi
10. Thousand Cranes by Yasunari Kawabata
11. What You Are Looking for is in The Library by Michiko Aoyama (explore unfamiliar aisles)
12. The Islands by Albert Alberts (SS)
13. Rain in the Mountains: Notes from the Himalayas by Ruskin Bond (NF/Memoir/ Personal Essays)
14. A Month in the Country by J.L. Carr (loved it *)
15. Schoolgirl by Osamu Dazai (novella)
16. Diary of a Tuscan Bookshop by Alba Donati
17. The Body - 10 Things You Should Know by Dr Darragh Ennis
18. A Haiku Journey - Basho's Narrow Road to a Far Province - translated by Dorothy Britton
19. Independent People by Halldor Laxness (loved it *)
20. Oaxaca Journal by Oliver Sacks (NF/ Journal)
21. Consolations of the Forest (Alone in a Cabin in the Middle Taiga) by Sylvain Tesson
22. Reading & Writing - A Personal Account by V. S. Naipaul (Personal essay)
23. Things That Are, Essays by Amy Leach (Refreshing, interesting)
24. The Pole and Other Stories by J. M. Coetzee (SS)
25. Kim by Rudyard Kipling (loved it *) 
26. Naag Mountain by Manisha Anjali (Prose poems)
27. A Way to be Free by Ben Okri (Essays)
28. The Guide by R K Narayan
29. The Tree of Man by Patrick White (love the writing *)
30. Inadvertent by Karl Ove Knausgaard (lecture)
31. A Time for New Dreams by Ben Okri (Essays)
32. Dandelions by Yasunari Kawabata (his last, unfinished novel but then it is Kawabata, which is never really finished)
33. Three Early Stories by J. D. Salinger (SS)
34. Christos Tsiolkas on Patrick White (Writers on Writers)
35. Divine and Human and other stories by Leo Tolstoy (SS)
36. Foe by J. M. Coetzee
37. Beauty and Sadness by Yasunari Kawabata
38. Harvest by Jean Giono (in conversation with Independent People and The Tree of Man)
39. Devotion by Patti Smith 
40. Ceridwen Dovey on J.M. Coetzee (Writers on Writers) 
41. The Old Capital by Yasunari Kawabata
42. Pilgrim of the Clouds by Yuan Hung-tao (translated by Jonathan Chaves. Poems and Essays) 
43. On the Calculation of Volume I by Solvej Balle 
44. Age of Iron by J. M. Coetzee
45. Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi
46. The Bookbinder of Jericho by Pip Williams
47. Geraldine Brooks on Tim Winton (Writers on Writers)
48. Greek Lessons by Han Kang
49. Hojoki by Kamo no Chōmei (short prose-poem)
50. Hill by Jean Giono
51. On the Calculation of Volume II by Solvej Balle
52. The Woman from Sarajevo by Ivo Andric 
53. The Midnight Library by Matt Haig
54. A View from the Stars by Cixin Liu (mixed views, but then sci-fi and thoughts around it seem to interact with my own thoughts on this space...and I prefer a positive, hopeful, whole-making projection of humanity) 
55. Land's Edge by Tim Winton (Short poetic memoir. Loved it*)
56. Drylands by Thea Astley (a new author discovered. Held me well. Keen to read more from her. A collection of interlinked stories. And about words and reading.)
57. The Simple Act of Reading (collection of various Australian writers reflecting on reading
58. The Last Gift of the Master Artists by Ben Okri (begins with a gentle instruction of 'Read Slowly')
59. The Spare Room by Helen Garner (first of her novels that I've read)
60. Roman Stories by Jhumpa Lahiri (SS)
61. One Italian Summer by Pip Williams
62. A Pale View of Hills by Kazuo Ishiguro
63. Inspector Imanishi Investigates by Seicho Matsumoto
64. Daughters of the Vicar by DH Lawrence (Novella)
65. The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky 
66. The Makioka Sisters by Junichiro Tanizaki
67. Far from the Madding Crowd by Thomas Hardy (quite enjoyed it *)
68. Every Day I Read by Hwang Bo-Reum
69. A Long Petal of the Sea by Isabel Allende
70. Oh What A Paradise It Seems by John Cheever (novella)
71. Travels With a Donkey by Robert Louis Stevenson (* quite enjoyed this one)

2025 so far

 Mid-August. A short note.

• A lot of Yasunari Kawabata. I may not agree at times with his characters or may not like certain aspects, but the beauty his book evokes is so breathtaking, so otherworldly realms that worldly constructs, worldly morality, practical ideas seem to just fall away or dissolve. I feel that with Leonard Cohen's writing too, whose another novel hoping to read.
• Generally a lot from Japan and interestingly India too. Perhaps distance enough now to enjoy fiction from India. Or perhaps these books are still set in past, so generally enough distance to read objectively. (Whether one can do that ever is a question, wonder, reminder and practice).
• A trip to Japan late last year helped me back into these reading challenges, and generally a wider set of books helps. Books get more books somehow, so here I am, 42 books in the year so far. A lot more opened or are still open. By and by :)
• Some of the books are really small ones. So, not really any overall goal that I have, just like the idea of finishing a beautiful read. And the count helps at times. 
• This morning I finished reading Pilgrim of the Clouds by Yuan Hung-tao. It is similar to Hojoki and Dewdrops on an autumn leaf both of which I read earlier this year but waiting to read again before I enter them on finished books list. Also, similar to Basho's. In terms of the general atmosphere evoked by these books. To reread or read more from Basho too.
• Patrick White, Halldor Laxness and Ivo Andric - New discovered joys. Had read Voss earlier but Tree of Man is a book apart. All these authors, hope to keep reading more from.
• Books like Independent People, Tree of Man, Harvest - loved reading these almost myth-making tales. 
• Another one that I loved a lot was Three Cornered World by Natsume Soseki. Read late last year after Japan trip. Book acquired in Japan. Tried to find that atmosphere again in his other books, but no, three-cornered world is singular.
• Keen to read Mishima's Sea of Fertility. But in Part 2, there is a mini novel in the novel itself which somehow loses me again and again. Yet again I'll try.
• So many open at the moment, and so many so many so many more on reading wishlist. But as Ben Okri writes before he begins his Last gift of master artist - Read slowly. :)

2025 (Jan - mid August)

• Acts of Worship by Yukio Mishima (SS)
• The Rainbow by Yasunari Kawabata
• Spring Snow by Yukio Mishima (The Sea of Fertility - Part 1)
• Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop by Hwang Bo-Reumn (A day well spent is a life well lived)
• The Master of Go by Yasunari Kawabata
• Orbital by Samantha Harvey 
• The Bridge on the Drina by Ivo Andric (loved it *)
• Kokoro by Soseki Natsume
• A Bookshop in Algiers by Kaouther Adimi
• Thousand Cranes by Yasunari Kawabata
• What You Are Looking for is in The Library by Michiko Aoyama (explore unfamiliar aisles)
• The Islands by Albert Alberts (SS)
• Rain in the Mountains: Notes from the Himalayas by Ruskin Bond (NF/Memoir/ Personal Essays)
• A Month in the Country by J.L. Carr (loved it *)
• Schoolgirl by Osamu Dazai (novella)
• Diary of a Tuscan Bookshop by Alba Donati
• The Body - 10 Things You Should Know by Dr Darragh Ennis
• A Haiku Journey - Basho's Narrow Road to a Far Province - translated by Dorothy Britton
• Independent People by Halldor Laxness (loved it *)
• Oaxaca Journal by Oliver Sacks (NF/ Journal)
• Consolations of the Forest (Alone in a Cabin in the Middle Taiga) by Sylvain Tesson
• Reading & Writing - A Personal Account by V. S. Naipaul (Personal essay)
• Things That Are, Essays by Amy Leach (Refreshing, interesting)
• The Pole and Other Stories by J. M. Coetzee (SS)
• Kim by Rudyard Kipling (loved it *)
• Naag Mountain by Manisha Anjali (Prose poems)
• A Way to be Free by Ben Okri (Essays)
• The Guide by R K Narayan
• The Tree of Man by Patrick White (love the writing *)
• Inadvertent by Karl Ove Knausgaard (lecture)
• A Time for New Dreams by Ben Okri (Essays)
• Dandelions by Yasunari Kawabata (his last, unfinished novel but then it is Kawabata, which is never really finished)
• Three Early Stories by J. D. Salinger (SS)
• Christos Tsiolkas on Patrick White (Writers on Writers)
• Divine and Human and other stories by Leo Tolstoy (SS)
• Foe by J. M. Coetzee
• Beauty and Sadness by Yasunari Kawabata
• Harvest by Jean Giono (in conversation with Independent People and The Tree of Man)
• Devotion by Patti Smith
• Ceridwen Dovey on J.M. Coetzee (Writers on Writers)
• The Old Capital by Yasunari Kawabata
• Pilgrim of the Clouds by Yuan Hung-tao (translated by Jonathan Chaves. Poems and Essa

Independent People

It took me a while to read through this one. Twice I have borrowed it from library and worked through the renewal period. Not because it is not interesting or super difficult, just that each page needs to take its own time. I guess I like such description of a different place and time books, and the indomitable human spirit, the strong heart that works through whatever the circumstances of life be.

It is about Iceland. After visiting Japan, which to me felt so island-like, a different sort of undercurrent of an island nation, a different feeling that flows through people, culture, books, just the land itself. I was inspired to pick another island. I remember reading Clezio's writing on Mauritius, and it was beautiful, sparse, slow, tranquil, poetic in its own way. As Iceland also has a nobel prize winner, what better than to try to read one of their books. It is a country sort of removed from the rest of the world, a different geography, different means of living. How does the human spirit respond in these cases?

Reading it gave me the pleasure of those old Russian long books evoking a rich sense of time, place, sensibility. And yet, it is about the very basics, the trappings of life are the bare necessities to survive, the key thing is freedom, independence, or in some way, self-reliance. And that is a life affirming, positive spirit, an elevating idea, expanding the reader's heart. Guess we need more such ideas in the world, which expand people's hearts, make them aware of the divinities within, the indomitable human spirit, the biggest divinity ever.

The book cover says one of the readers saying that they cannot imagine a joy greater than coming to 'Independent People' for the first time. And then introduction talks about another reader calling it a book of their life. And after finishing it, slowly, unwillingly closing the last page, one almost understands the desire to reread. There is a difference between books that hook you and books that meet you on equal terms without sending out any hooks or grips. The hooking is generally in human sentimental register, the pleasures short-term, and as Shakespeare says, none too soon had than despised. But the equality of meeting, which I guess is the only principle that upholds the universe, allows the self to be lifted to the same level as the principle on other side. It doesn't hold, bound, grip or hook you. It lets you be. And you return of your own accord, drawn by the simplicity, the sincerity, the truth of the writing. And one needs to keep getting away to assimiliate it well. And one needs to keep coming back. And it takes all the time in the world! Guess the difference between great literature and any other writing.

I have been reading many other things, and then I have this personal reading project of reading the nobel winners - one thinks that given they come from across the world, and their word has been revered, regarded well by so many, one can just about aspire to know the world through those words, and those eyes. And then I read bridge on drina earlier this year, I read Kawabata, I am reading Tagore, and I read Laxness. And I read a lot many new and old authors which set the world context of their time and place, but the spirit context is set by these amazing (the N prize) writers I guess. Their slow, rich prose. Their way of seeing the world. Their wisdom, good sense, good, healthy sense. Their positive undercurrent affirming life and spirit and 'whatever the circumstances, it is about moving forward in the best possible way', despite all the human miseries going on in the books yet yet yet uplifts you. What better prayer for a reader?

Reading update

The Bridge On the Drina (by Ivo Andric)

It took me a few weeks to read through. One of the more beautiful reads of recent times. 

There are some authors whose outlook of life, view of the world, the perspective they bring to bear on things, lends power, freedom and lifts the reader from the shallow bonds and bounds of daily existence. Andric has such a perspective. Which comes across perhaps less in quotes but just the by the way, the things the author assumes, takes for granted, works as a base from. It cheers you up, however low you feel. Lifts you up to a better perspective, a better seeing where the self is almost forgotten and life as Life is any random life, could be anyone, could be anything, just happens to be people in the story. And even things which are sorrowful and sad, somehow come out with quiet life affirming power, people moving forward with whatever resources they have, making the best of their circumstances. Doesn't it bind us all together? The random varied instances of life that we all are, spread around in different circumstances, each on a personal journey, yet each, still a human being, stumbling, fumbling, imperfect being, trying to make the best of the set of cards one plays with.

Another way to perhaps express it is it rises above the sentiment, the shallows of emotion, the highs and lows of any life, and takes it as a for granted base (that life is like this, for all living beings, everyone just at a different point of roller coaster, so horizontal comparisons are sort of senseless), and builds a beautiful work of literature on that life as we all know it base.

The book is around the bridge on Drina, a river in Bosnia, the town of Visgerad. Centered around the bridge, spanning across 300 years, it tells the history of lives and people living around it. Through it, a sort of rough human history of last few hundred years, although local to Eastern European base. Espisodes and short narratives, sort of loosely connected short stories but such a beautiful look into history, culture and lives of people. And perhaps many books do that, but few authors can elevate life and the reader the way Andric does. 

I read his Bosnian Chronicles a while ago. Do not think I have much notes but was fascinated by the slow moving narrative yet rich and picturesque, a different time and world and yet, lifelike setting. But in this book, perhaps as I get back to reading goals, and open up my reading list and borrowed shelf to wider range, one realises again and again why classics be classics. 

Loved it for its slow richness, and its quiet power. Perhaps it won't be out of place to say, that the noisy world we live in, we all can do with more such head clearing perspective and lifting up.

 

Augustus and education

One of my current reads is Augustus, by John Williams. This is my second Williams novel (after Stoner). 

Augustus is organised like a documentary: different angles and point-of-views through different documents. Most of these are letters and journals of different parties, some reports and notes that slowly unfold history. I like both: the way it is written and the subject matter. It has displacement (which is akin to a sci-fi). A different, noble world opens up, where the thought and language rhythms are high and noble, and people seem to display all the beautiful virtues from respect, restraint of manner, fortitude to grace under pressure. All that tends to speak to the high in a self, the noble, perhaps making it respond in some way. And it is simply nice to encounter nobility of manner, wherever one comes across it. 

Where the first half or two-thirds of the book kept me enthralled, somehow, I couldn't see myself through the latter part. (Not sure why. Perhaps the tone changes once the book begins to curve around his daughter Julia rather than Augustus.)

*

But no matter the reading, the thought that brings me here is education.

I find the education of princes/nobles/ those who had access to such things, quite interesting and fascinating to look at. When one is brought up in that privilege, what do they learn, or where do they direct their learning energies? Or rather when education was available to only a select few across the world, how did it look like.

For instance, from the book, here is Julius Caesar writing to his niece Atia regarding the education of her son Ocatvius, the young Augustus:

Send the boy to Apollonia.

...

You must understand the importance of the command with which I began this letter. His Greek is atrocious, and his rhetoric is weak; his philosophy is fair, but his knowledge of literature is eccentric, to say the least. Are the tutors of Rome as slothful and careless as the citizens? In Apollonia he will read philosophy and improve his Greek with Athenodorous; he will enlarge his knowledge of literature and perfect his rhetoric with Apollodorus. I have already made the necessary arrangements.

Moreover, at his age he needs to be away from Rome; he is a youth of wealth, high station, and great beauty...In an atmosphere that is Spartan and disciplined, he will spend his mornings with the most learned scholars of our day, perfecting the humane art of the mind; and he will spend his afternoons with the officers of my legions, perfecting that other art without which no man is complete.

Following from the journal of Marcus Agrippa, one of Octavius's good friends:

Our mornings were spent in study. We rose before dawn, and heard our first lecture by lamplight; we breakfasted on coarse food when the sun shone above the eastern mountains; we discoursed in Greek on all things (a practice which, I fear, is dying now), and spoke aloud those passages from Homer we had learned the night before, accounted for them, and finally offered brief declamations that we had prepared according to the stipulations of Apollodorus (who was ancient even then, but of even temper and great wisdom).

In the afternoon, we were driven a little beyond the city to the camp where Julius Caesar's legions were training; and there, for a good part of the rest of the day, we shared their exercises. 

Here following, from later in the book, about education of Julia, daughter of Augustus. Phaedrus (Julia's current tutor), writing to Augustus:

Your daughter Julia is fast approaching that point in her education at which I can no longer adequately perform as you would wish...she composes easily in Greek; she has mastered those more fundamental elements of rhetoric which I have exposed her to,...and your friend Horace intermittently aids her with that poetry in his own tongue.

Later, from Julia's journal, when following this above note, her education was put in charge of Athenodorus who taught Ocatvius in Apollonia:

Athenodorus, who gave me my first vision of a world outside myself, my family, and even of Rome, was a stern and unrelenting master. ...

We were made to arise before dawn and to assemble at the first hour at Athenodorous's home, where we recited the lines from Homer or Hesiod or Aeschylus that we had been assigned the day before; we attemted compositions of our own in the styles of those poets; and at noon we had a light lunch. In the afternoon, the boys devoted themselves to exercises in rhetoric and decalmation, and to the study of law; such subjects being deemed inappropriate for me, I was allowed to use my time otherwise, int he study of philosophy, and int he elucidation of whatever poems, Latin or Greek, that I chose, and in compostion upon whatever matters struck my fancy...

Not just Julia, but other children in the family group, mostly boys also undergo this education.

*

Where this education from the Roman nobility leans more towards learning and in the case of Octavius, physical training, as a counterpoint, consider the following here from India, from the early Mughal times. Here is Babur's plan for education of his much younger cousin Haider (from The Great Mughals - Bamber Gascoigne). Here, there seems to be more all-round skill development as well.

Haidar describes his education as having consisted in the 'arts of calligraphy, reading, making verses, epistolary style, painting and illumination...such crafts as seal-engraving, jeweller's and goldsmith's work, saddlery and armour-making, also in the construction of arrows, spear-heads and knives...in the affaris of the State, in important transactions, in planning campaigns and forays, in archery, in hunting, in the training of falcons and in everything that is useful in the government of a kingdom.'

*

To think that those young folks were being trained to be rulers - they were to be good rulers, capable, virtuous, noble and courageous. 

Exploratory thought - Perhaps one can see the difference between education supervised by a leader compared to that by a tutor. Babur and Caesar were men of action, as well as seems like with a bent of mind which allowed contemplation. Perhaps that allowed for the physical skills to be brought in the fold of education as well. 

Further, it seems that any education perhaps is close to ideal when it addresses both the body and the mind. A strong mind in a strong/graceful body with beautiful virtues is perhaps an ideal human too. In the time of universal education it is good to remind ourselves of how the elite education at times looked like. And although people are not generally being trained to be rulers, perhaps realising the best version possible of any human being should be the noble aim of any education. Perhaps hence, to promote in education anything which can train the body and mind with high levels of discipline, tools and skills, make it capable, independent and in some way, elite.

Blank page

"as if the grain
Remembered what the mallet tapped to know." (Seamus Henaey)

Sometimes I feel like this with blank paper. It feels as if it knows what it holds, and like a chisel, fingers work to unfold it, or to gently lay out what it has been holding in its fists for eternity thus far. Gently, unfolding, it remembers word by word, phrase by phrase, what it eventually holds and what it has been holding forever. Like a veil lifting from the blank page to reveal the words on the page. As if, the whole pursuit of hide and seek was this, a slow, gradual, word by word unveiling of the blank page.

Alberto Manguel

Recently, I came across Alberto Manguel in a second-hand book sale (A Reading Diary). Reading the first chapter sent me looking for more books by him in the libraries around me. I then found one of his more recent books, Packing My Library (An Elegy and Ten Digressions).

'A Reading Diary' has a chapter devoted to a month, where he revisits an old favorite. It begins in June. The first one he picks up to reread is The Invention of Morel (by Adolfo Bioy Casares). Before getting on to the next month in the reading diary, I wished to savour what he savours.

The Invention of Morel is available at the Internet Archive (here). It is a novella, or a long short story of 90 pages. It is science fiction exploring the questions of immortality:

"I believe we lose immortality because we have not conquered our opposition to death; we keep insisting on the primary, rudimentary idea: that the whole body should be kept alive. We should seek to preserve only the part that has to do with consciousness."

**

Manguel's A Reading Diary is written near about the year 2000 (I think). Incidentally, he has just moved to his fifteenth-century house in France (a year or so ago)  and in a way, is unpacking his large library, keeping books on shelves, after years of those books being in storage. He talks about books he looks at and all the interesting digressions they open up.  His passages are like a poet's, with high reference, and some really beautiful tangents.

This other book (Packing My Library), is written around 2015, when due to certain reasons he must leave France and is packing the library.

Reading while alternating between these books, there is an awareness of the transience of the library which the author of 'a reading diary' is yet unaware of. How life, any life, shapes up. The occassions are bittersweet, but the digressions always lovely. I have a new long list of books to look up next and poems that I have opened up to read. 

(Later- I enjoy his Reading Diary much more than Packing my Library. Packing my Library seems more bitter, notes of despair, anguish on losing his library. Reading Diary is much more nuanced, hopeful, a world opening up with really beautiful tangents.. I abandoned the Packing book at some point midway.)

His personal library has thirty-five thousand books (!). Although he has written quite a few books, he refers to himself mainly as a reader.

Keen to read more from him, yet also keen to take the chapters in the books slowly, I looked up more from him, and found some writing by him online here: his page. 

A poem

I recently discovered Louis Macneice in a poetry anthology. 

This poem, 'Snow' by Macneice

The room was suddenly rich and the great bay-window was
Spawning snow and pink roses against it
Soundlessly collateral and incompatible:
World is suddener than we fancy it.

World is crazier and more of it than we think,
Incorrigibly plural. I peel and portion
A tangerine and spit the pips and feel
The drunkenness of things being various.

And the fire flames with a bubbling sound for world
Is more spiteful and gay than one supposes—
On the tongue on the eyes on the ears in the palms of one's hands—
There is more than glass between the snow and the huge roses.

The simple reader in me is awed. Rhythms and flow of language, of words, such complexity with this simplicity, is perhaps what eloquence is.

Poets with their metaphors and their language open up the world anew to you or perhaps they open a new window to the world, the way world has not been seen or apprehended in the reader's recent memory. Some of the best vantage points to life is perhaps found in poetry. A poem like Snow just shows how.

Here is a long poem (Autumn Journal) by Macneice that I found online. Planning to read the Autumn Journal (I have read first two segments so far). The way some poets can use words is amazing! There are so many poets and poems that one can keep quoting from, or perhaps learning from, this art of words.

Their Eyes Were Watching God

A very short note to say that this was a delightful reading experience. The speed itself renewed faith in reading fiction, and the magic of fiction. Loved that the book stands for itself, like its characters. Strong, vibrant, life lived well, as in lived fully, by giving one's all. Little else I can do at the moment except look more from her or more thoughts about the book. Joy and delight. Although the tale is not all happy, there is a calmness and peace, a fullness. A mental strength. Strength and joy are the carried away emotions. Many things to note down, perhaps if I read it again.  

Knausgaard

Reading Knausgaard. His essays, 'In The Land of the Cyclops'. Again and again when I read him, this about him: the meditative prose. Drawing in, and then plenty of departure points for thoughts to take off. A sort of soothing rhythm of the writing. The sentences keep flowing one after the another, not in a rush, but slowly, quietly. Like his collection, Winter and Autumn. I am yet to read the other two (Spring, Summer). I couldn't take up part three of 'My Struggle'. It felt too close to life, and generally my reading time is also a little bit of reflective time, if it pushes in or plates up the same day-to -day again with all its practical concerns or the surface noise, somehow I get caught up in it and do not find the reflective doors or channels. Just a matter of mood. Sometimes when I am feeling more upbeat, secure, generally on top of world, perhaps I can attempt it. Anyhow, the point was that the essays seem to be at a slight distance. The essay gives a structure, a particular subject which becomes the board from where and to which the discussion keeps coming in and looping out. And all the pleasures of the Knausgaard sentences are there. 

As some writings are like verb, a state, a space of its own, where you not only see what the writer says, but somehow it is so opening, or inviting to open up yourself that you spend a lot of time on the same pages, reading, thinking, imagining. Because there are so many tangents that shoot out of these pages. And one has to, has to trace a few. Those are the delights of any reading, and here, there seem to be heaps. It takes longer to read, but then the time reading those pages is so rich.

I began to read these essays in sequence, but somehow the painting essays didn't hold me so I skipped ahead to ones which have more of a reader in them. And I can read almost anywhere and the prose opens up warmly to hold you. The ones on Northern Lights, the one on Submission, the one called 'Idiots of the Cosmos'... it is not even about the subject but more about the tangents. That what he thinks about the moon, the universe and how perhaps life appears to those living in long days and long nights, that somewhere I too have felt something similar, is one little thing, but that there are things like this spread throughout the book. And each of these is a treasure. One needs to pause and consider it. Contemplate it. See it well from the almost multiple angles it opens...light bouncing off willy nilly from so many angles and surfaces. 

So, keen to keep reading it. And perhaps revisit. Prose like this, which is a state, a verb, less like a book, more an invitation to a show. Or an event everytime one reads those sentences. Delighted.

**

I wrote this a few days ago. Then I got off Knausgaard and haven't found my way back in. Somehow, it is like this with his writing. Quite surrounded by it, and then on consideration, or as it seeps deeper, perhaps what stays is little - that is the thing with writing that is verb. I don't know, somehow when there is too much of a person or a person's surface in their writing, the seeping in process is strange. There is tug, a push and pull between your likes and the person you encounter through this reading. And generally, in such a tug, the generous souls find their way deeper, or people who can do that dance with self and yet not a self - the personal yet the classical, I don't know how to put it. Those who can talk about the self and yet leave the self out of it. Here I have in mind DFW and his generosity. Somehow, as the writing makes it way to deeper levels, it needs to stand by itself, strong in its truth, its largesse, its uplifting or enriching or elevating capacities. 

Perhaps that is why I enjoy Knausgaard while reading him, for all the doors and tangents it opens. But in terms of staying or lingering or the reaching deep, it is just different, it is a lot of surface. It is just the kind of writing, and little to do with the person. The writing which is a theater, a state, verb and then there is writing which can hold its own at all depths. 

Slow reader

This strife with oneself. There seems to be an ocean to be read, and then one's span, or scoop size, a page at a time. When one reads slowly, wanderingly, digressingly, taking off at every suitable departure point for a tangent, one often lands in these conversations with self. About how and what to read. The aspirations are very high, but at the same time, one reads slowly, perhaps a few pages a day. 

One would think that even at that pace, one could read a lot as long as there is discipline. Should the discipline be allowed into the digressions too? I think not. Then perhaps a better question is what is the objective? Is it the number of books or pages or is it the quality of thoughts during the reading time, or where a page of written words can take you? And the funny thing is there is no good way to measure that. Except perhaps a sense of contentment that a few pages are enough. The mind's chasing of numbers, this other conversation about non measurable contentment - it is like holding your own on the beach at the edge of waves coming in and going out, slowly the ground seems to shift, your feet sink and you know not the ground that you stand on. Then you keep reminding yourself of the objective often. That is, shifting your feet in the sand again and again to find firm footing. Reminding yourself again of the bit about contentment. The objective is perhaps that hour or two with words is beautiful, is full of tangents perhaps or a nice story or a deep thought that opens something inside you. This random measure of pages read or books covered, a lifetime is small perhaps to what one would like to read, especially at the slow pace. And not because of that, but because what you read for - sometimes a paragraph is enough, sometimes a page is good. And contentment helps. Else it is a random conversation with self. And you carry on some endless pursuit chasing pages. Perhaps not to read if you see a FOMO creeping up. 

My thoughts at the moment after a particularly random conversation with self. Let's see if this is solid ground or shifting sands. Check on these again sometime soon. And to reflect on the non-measure of a slow reader.

**

When I was younger, the Literature text books were a curated thing, a few essays, short stories, extracts, poems. One was to read everything deeply, over and over again, getting familiar with the text. Then one grows up, and encounters this ocean alone. As in, the whole world and all its books are there. How do you pick? Classics perhaps is one good place to begin. Book Lists. Nobel prize winners. Guidance from other readers perhaps who have read a lot. And then sometimes one likes an author, and tries to read as much from them. The list keeps getting longer. What I perhaps mean to say that the way one read for school, over and over again until the meanings surrender, as they say, it changes as one grows up and reads for pleasure. Still, there are some writings that are like that. That require me to pause, and read again and again, trying to imprint it on my mind, perhaps noting it down on paper, perhaps just reading it again, and yet again. One doesn't move much forward that way, but one reaches a satiety or contentment which somehow chasing numbers doesn't get one.

Perhaps this truce with oneself, that slow reading is perhaps the way to be. That it matters not that there is the ocean out there. A few pearls that find their way to your reading time are plenty. 

It is a learning. A slow process. Something to imbibe. Because time and again I find myself in this conversation with self, about the slowness of my reading and the vastness of the aspiration. 

**

Then this essay found its way to me. 'On reading to oneself' from the Habitations of the word by William H Gass. It can be found here (pg 216). This one is one of those which require rereading often, in the hope that some of it would imprint on the mind.

A sentence that I carry with me - ' to be a paragon of appreciation'. The larger paragraph in which it appears is here below:

But the educated and careful tongue will taste and discriminate this particular stew from every other. Tasting is a dialectical process in which one proceeds from general to specific similarities, but this can be accomplished only through a series of differentiations. Antonymical tasting (which also sounds disgusting) ultimately "identified: this dish, not only as pure stew, but as Brunswick strw, and knows whether it was done in Creole style or not, and then finally it recognizes, in this plater's present version of the recipe, that the squirrels were fat and gray and came from Mississippi where they fed on elderberries and acorns of the swamp oak. One grasps an act, an object, an idea, a sentence, synthetically, simply by feeling or receiving its full effect - in the case of the stew that means its complete, unique taste. I need not be able to name the ingredients; I need not be able to describe how the dish was prepared; but I should be a paragon of appreciation. This quality, because it is the experience of differentiation within a context of comparison, cannot be captured in concepts, cannot be expressed in words. Analytical tasting has a different aim. It desires to discover what went into the dish; it reconstructs the recipe, and recreates the method of its preparation. It moves from effects to causes.

Love the wild swan

One of the other books I'm reading these days is Czeslaw Milosz's A Year of the Hunter. This book is a diary of a year, 1987 Aug - 1988 July. I am still on early pages, now beginning September. 

I just perhaps need to reiterate this thing about a poet's prose. Somehow a poet's sensibility and the relationship with words, metaphors, phrases, sentences is quite something. The economy of the prose, the simplicity yet the depth it can reflect. Like deep, clean, refreshing pool of water. Generally, it is a treat to read prose by poets.

Here's a little paragraph and a poem he refers to from the preface:

There is also another explanation for the title. My youthful dreams of excursions "on the trail of nature" were never fulfilled, and yet I did become a hunter, although of a different sort: my game was the entire visible world and I have devoted my life trying to capture it in words, to making a direct hit with words. Alas, the present year of the hunter brings, in the main, reflections on the incommensurability of aspirations and accomplishments, despite the existence of an entire shelf of books written by me. I repeat to myself a poem by Robinson Jeffers that I translated into Polish a long time ago, and I see more clearly than ever before that I could well have adopted it as the motto for all my creative work:

Love The Wild Swan

"I hate my verses, every line, every word.
Oh pale and brittle pencils ever to try
One grass-blade's curve, or the throat of one bird
That clings to twig, ruffled against white sky.
Oh cracked and twilight mirrors ever to catch
One color, one glinting flash, of the splendor of things.
Unlucky hunger, Oh bullets of wax,
The lion beauty, the wild-swan wings, the storm of the wings."
- This wild swan of a world is no hunter's game.
Better bullets than yours would miss the white breast,
Better mirrors than yours would crack in the flame.
Does it matter whether you hate your...self? At least
Love your eyes that can see, your mind that can
Hear the music, the thunder of the wings. Love the wild swan.

Czeslaw Milosz received the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1980. Here is his Nobel Lecture. His fame he believes is narrow, what he calls "providential equanimity inscribed in my destiny: never too much fame, just the right amount."

Some time back I bought a book of his poems, translated. The poems are yet to find me. But his another collection, a poetry anthology 'A Book of Luminous Things' finds me flipping through its pages often. He has selected poems from all over the world, often translated, and presented across a few key themes. So many poems like the one above. A beautiful selection.

More from 'A Year of the Hunter' if I am able to read through more. 

A General Theory of Oblivion

Read this book at my pen friend’s recommendation. Novel by Jose Eduardo Agualusa. Translated from Portugese. It is about a woman, in Angola, living in an apartment locked out from the world for over thirty years, surviving. 

But perhaps it is also a quiet thank-you note to the simple joys of reading. A reader cannot help but note the sentences of reading-love spread throughout the book. I have collected some, here they are:

On the apartment, the books

Orlando owned a valuable library - thousands of titles, in Portugese, French, Spanish, English and German, among which almost all the great classics of universal literature were to be found. 

The misreading

My weakness, my vanishing eyesight, it means I stumble over letters as I read. I read pages I've read so many times before, but they're different now. I get things wrong, as I read, and in those mistakes, sometimes, I find incredible things that are right.

Further,

If I still had the space, the charcoal, and available walls, I could compose a great work about forgetting: a general theory of oblivion.

I realise I have transformed the entire apartment into a huge book. After burning the library, after I have died, all that remains will be my voice.

The books, burnt

Whenever she wanted to go out she would look for a book in the library. She felt, as she went on burning those books, after having burned all the furniture, the doors, the wooden floor tiles, that she was losing her freedom. It was as though she was incinerating the whole planet. When she burned Jose Amado she stopped being able to visit Ilheus and Sao Salvador. BurningUlysses, by Joyce, she had lost Dublin. Getting rid of Three Trapped Tigers, she incinerated old Havana. There were fewer than a hundred books left. She kept them more out of stubbornness than to make any use of them.

The boy learning to read

Then the boy did the washing-up and put away the crockery. He roamed about the house, curious:

'You know you've got a lot of books.'

'A lot of books? Yes, I did have a lot. There aren't many now.'

'I've never seen so many.'

'Can you read?'

'I'm not very good at putting the letters together. I only did one year at school.'

'Would you like me to teach you? I'll teach you to read and then you can read to me.'

Subalu learned to read while Ludo convalesced.

The doorman

Nasser Evangelista was pleased with his new job. He wore a blue uniform, very clean, and spent most of his time sitting at a desk, reading, while he watched the foor out the corner of his eye. He had developed his taste for reading during the years spent locked up in Sao Paulo prison in Luanda.

...That morning, Nasser Evangelista was rereading, for the seventh time, tge adventures of Robinson Crusoe..

Monte and his retirement

He planned to spend his final years rereading Jorge Amado, Machado de Assis, Clarice Lispector, Luandino Vieira, Ruy Duarte de Carvalho, Julio Cortazar, Gabriel Garcia Marquez.

The woman, now old:

'My family is this boy, that mulemba tree out there, and a phantom dog. My eyesight gets worse every day... In any case, I don't aspire to any more: the light, Sabalu reading to me, the joy of a pomegranate every day.'

***

Lots about books, and reading.

And just perhaps how nature feels about her human children. So lost in ideas, forgetting the basics. Some sensible advice:

'You can eat better without spending more', she explained to Little Chief. 'You and your friends fill your mouths with big words  - Social Justice, Freedom, Revolution - and meanwhile people waste away, they fall ill, many of them die. Speeches don't feed people. What the people need are fresh vegetables, and a good fish broth at least once a week. I'm only interested in the kinds of revolution that starts off by getting people sat at the table.'

***

Another little beauty:

Exorcism

I carve out verses
short
as prayers

words are
legions
of demons
expelled

I cut adverbs
pronouns

I spare my
wrists

***

The book itself didn’t take long to read. In a long while have I read something this quickly. Just a few hours. It reminded me briefly of 2666, Bolano. Just an image.

Brief chapters, interspersed with empty title pages, the chapter titles like a poem running through the book, a lot of breathing space yet keeps you moving quick. Things converge, things so disparate converge… in a set of coincidences that forms the core narrative. But it is not a narrative. Perhaps a brief sketch. Underlying the sketch is a personal tragedy, that doesn’t make itself felt, except perhaps in the eccentricities. I feel that there is still an affirming of life in the book. The argument of to be or not to be is more between memory and forgetting. A general theory of oblivion.

Enjoyed the read.

A sonnet by Keats

Yesterday I came across this sonnet by Keats:

Sonnet VII - O Solitude! if I must with thee dwell

O Solitude! if I must with thee dwell,

Let it not be among the jumbled heao

Of murky buildings; climb with me the steep,—

Nature's  observatory—whencethe dell,

Its flowery slopes, its river's crystal swell,

May seem a span; let me thy vigils keep

'Mongst boughs pavillion'd, where the deer's swift leap

Startles the wild bee from the fox-glove bell.

But though I'll gladly trace these scenes with thee,

Yet the sweet converse of an innocent mind,

Whose words are images of thoughts refin'd,

Is my soul's pleasure; and it sure must be

Almost the highest bliss of human-kind,

When to thy haunts two kindred spirits flee.

Perhaps it means something else in its closing lines, but one can also read it for the sweet converse or a company with books, writers and some good writing. Perhaps.

Les Miserables

Les Miserables has many detours of sorts, or rather pools of reflection at something or the other. Some sort of essays, thought-chains which explore some aspect of Paris, France, the world then. Sometimes, it is about revolutions, at other times, other ideas. I am in the last quarter of the book. When there is so much depth and thinking going on, it is difficult to keep reading quickly. One can do so with dialogues and the story lines, but essays need slower pace. Sharing a beautiful passage I read today, here below. This passage/view from somewhere in the middle of nineteenth century, a view of the world and a hope for the world to come. 

"...And what revolution are we going to bring about? I just told you: the revolution of the True. From the political standpoint, there is only one principle: the sovereignty of man over himself. This sovereignty I have over myself is known as Liberty. Wherever two or more such sovereignties gather together, the State begins. But in this gathering together, there is no abdication. Each sovereignty concedes a certain portion of itself to form the common right. This portion is the same for all. The identical nature of the concession that each makes to all is known as Equality. Common right is nothing more nor less than the protection of all shining on the right of each. This protection of all over each is known as Fraternity. The point of intersection of all these aggregate sovereignties is known as Society. This intersection being a junction, the point is a node. Hence what is known as the social bond. Some say social contract; which is the same thing, the word contract being etymologically formed by the notion of a bond. Let's understand each other in regard to equality; for if liberty is the high point, equality is the base. Equality, citizens, is not the levelling of all the vegetation, a society of tall blades of grass and short oak trees, a community of envies leaping at each other's throats; it is, in civic terms, all aptitudes having the same opportunity; in political terms, all votes having the same weight; in religious terms, all consciences having the same right. Equality has an organ: free and compulsory education. The right to the alphabet - that's where we have to start. Primary school imposed on everyone, secondary school offered to everyone - that's the rule. From the school that is identical springs the equal society. Yes, education! Light! Light! Everything comes from light and everything comes down to it. Citizens, the nineteenth century is great, but the twentieth century will be happy. Then there will be nothing left of the old history; there will be no more fear, like there is today, of conquest, invasion, usurpation, rivalry between nations by force of arms, civilizations interrupted by some marriage of kings, a birth in the hereditary tyrannies, the division of nations by congress, dismemberment through the downfall of some dynasty, some battle between two religions going head to head, like two billy goats in the shadows, on the bridge of the infinite; they will not have to fear any more famine, exploitation, prostitution caused by distress, misery casued by unemployment, and the scaffold, and the blade, and battles and all the armed robberies casued by chance in the forest of events. People will be happy. The human race will live upto its law, just as the terrestrial globe lives up to its law; harmony will be reestablished between the soul and the star. The soul will gravitate around the truth, just as the star does around the light. Friends, the moment we have reached, this moment in which I am speaking to you, is a sombre moment; but this is the terrible price the future extracts. A revolution is a tollgate. Oh, the human race will be delivered, lifted up and consoled! We swear to it on this barricade. Where will the cry of love go up from if not from the height of sacrifice? O, my brothers, this is the very spot where those who think and those who suffer come together as one; this barricade is not made of cobblestones, or wooden beams, or scrap iron; it is made of two heaps, a heap of ideas and a heap of pain. Misery meets the ideal here. The day embraces the night here and says to it: I am going to die with you and you will be born again with me. From this embracing of all sorrows springs faith. Suffering brings its agony here, and ideas their immortality. This agony and this immortality are going to mingle and compose our death. Brother, whoever dies here dies in the radiance of the future, and we will enter a grave entirely lit up by dawn."

Perhaps a linking thought is that people seem to do the best from that is in front of them (building on K's idea). One can regard one's place in history, but there is little one can do about it. One can just play the road, do the next thing that seems like the best option. And with these steps, one by one, what we call the narrative of history is shaped. 

But we often tend to forget of the way the world has been shaped. We live in the present with its good and bad, and forget how the world has changed, and evolved. And each step forward brings its own issues, yet, from the times - isn't it a better world for more people? Perhaps. While living in some sort of history, one cannot say much about anything, it is a moving thing, difficult to be a good judge. But it would be wanting on our part not to appreciate the way the world is today, not for everyone, but perhaps more people than ever before live in basic comfort and access never ever witnessed by perhaps even the kings of prior times. And yet, if one just takes a glance at sustainable development goals, and the inequality, our age has its own big battles to fight - from access to water to a freedom of being. And then after all this, after everything, after all this talk about progress, access, one wonders whether we have got the map itself wrong - when one looks at the malaise & some sort of mediocrity and an emptiness that excessive comfort breeds. 

But these are conjectures. As noted above, one or an age perhaps does what seems like the best option at that point, and although hindsight loves  to weave everything as a narrative or rationale, it is not a narrative, neither a rationale. Every point in time has its own decision matrix which other times cannot judge well. We can perhaps just be grateful for the deeds of the great people of any time. The shoulders of giants, as they say. 

A poem

Today brought this poem by Czeslaw Milosz. 

Secretaries

I am no more than a secretary of the invisible thing
That is dictated to me and a few others.
Secretaries, mutually unknown, we walk the earth
Without much comprehension. Beginning a phrase in the middle
Or ending it with a comma. And how it all looks when completed
Is not up to us to inquire, we won't read it anyway.

Another of his poem has this phrase :  if not I, then someone else/ Would be walking here, trying to understand his age.

My current read

Since I take weeks/months sometimes to read some books, and since I also wish to keep adding to this page here, I've thought I'll perhaps share a little bit more about what goes on in my reading space. 

I am currently reading Les Miserables. I began sometime in June after finishing Moby Dick, which still sits close, opened sometimes to just get back the flavor of that language and poetry. Les Miserables (I heard someone call it LesMis on a TV show), is a long book. It has 48 mini books in it. I am somewhere beyond midway. Yesterday, I happened on a beautiful page - a diary extract which a person leaves for another person to read. It is something worth noting from. Some passages here below. 

But before getting into that, a little bit more about the book. It has that similar high energy throughout which some long books have with a slowly building and unfolding narrative. And then there are those sections, won't call them detours but these essay like chapters or books which take you out of the story into something else - be it the June 18th battle of Waterloo, or the mechanisms of a convent, or just Paris of early 19th century. A lot of instances like that which help in making the book come alive - or the time and space it is set in come alive. I am enjoying reading it, and although part of me that keeps pace and looks at the bookmark against the closed book for progress wishes to read quickly, part of me wants to take the passages slowly, specially some chapters which revive the time and place, and just how people lived then. Still a few hundred pages to go. 

This book is a new translation by Julie Rose from 2008. 

Other few explorations include Margaret Atwood's Curious Pursuits. There are a few others, but more another time. Now to the passages from Les Miserables which I wish to copy, - echoes of Sufi thought:  

The reduction of the universe to one single being, the expansion of one single being into God: That is what love is.


Love is the angels' greeting to the stars.


God is behind all things, but all things hide God. Things are black, human beings opaque. To love someone is to make them transparent.


Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, whatever the body's position, the soul is on its knees.


Lovers who are separated cheat absence by a thousand chimeras that, nonetheless, have their reality. They are prevented from seeing each other, they can't write to each other, yet they find a whole host of mysterious ways of communicating. They send each other birdsong, the perfume of flowers, the laughter of children, the sun's rays, the wind's sighs, starlight, all of Creation. And why not? All God's works are made to serve love. Love is powerful enough to load the whole of nature with its messages.
O spring, you are the letter I write to her.


The future belongs even more to hearts than to minds. Loving is the only thing that can occupy and fill eternity. The infinite requires the inexhaustible.


Love partakes of the soul itself. It is of the same nature. Like the soul, it is a divine spark, like the soul, it is incorruptible, indivisible, imperishable. It is a point of fire that is inside us, that is everlasting and infinite, that nothing can limit and that nothing can extinguish. You feel it burn right to the marrow of your bones and you see it shine out to the back of the sky.


O love! Adoration! Sensual joy of two minds that understand each other, of two hearts that are exchanged, of two glances that pierce each other through!...I have sometimes dreamed that now and then the hours broke away from the life of the angels and came down here below to traverse the destiny of men.


...God is the fullness of heaven; love is the fullness of mankind.


When love has melted and blended two beings in an angelic and sacred unity, the secret of life is open to them; they are nothing more, then, than the two sides of a single destiny; they are nothing more than the two wings of a single spirit. Love, soar!


Deep hearts, wise spirits, take life the way God made it. It is a long ordeal, an unintelligible preparation for an unknown destiny. ...Try to love souls and you will find them again.


What a great thing, to be loved! What an even greater thing, to love! The heart becomes heroic through passion. It is no longer made up of anything but what is pure; it no longer relies on anything but what is elevated and grand. An unworthy thought can no more germinate in it than a nettle on a glacier. The lofty and serene soul, out of reach of vulgar passions and emotions, rises above the clouds and shadows of this world, the follies, the lies, the hatreds, the vanities, the miseries, and inhabits the endless skies and feels only the deep and subterranean rumblings of destiny, as the mountain peak feels earthquakes.


If there wasn't someone who loved, the sun would go out.

'Intrepid effort of the soul'

Over the last couple of years I have read a handful of books perhaps. Some of them were long books and took me long weeks, if not months. Most recent was Moby Dick. 

Moby Dick was a surprisingly rewarding reading experience. Surprising, because it is one of those books one has often heard about, but the reading of it was completely different from any of the heard instances. It was a refreshingly fun, some sort of live-wire energy flowing through it. 

Everything about the book was delightful - the language, its poetry, the tone, the intonations, the subject matter or the main preoccupation of the narrator, the world it describes. And then, add to it a series of essays interwoven in the narrative. I call it a series of essays because each one begins anew and afresh - and opens up a new world for you, again and again. Each one has that fresh energy. And then throughout the book are fabulous passages one wishes to share with the world, or take the people around you by hand and make them read those passages. Usually such fabuolous, deep writing tends to be about life and philosophy interwoven with the narrative or the story - layered and deep - what I perhaps mean to say is that the quality of the writing or the richness is because of the writer's thoughts interspersed throughout the book which shed a unique light on life and world, and in that, connect to something deep within the reader – to bring home to reader’s own life and world. 

In their keenness to share an entirety with you, a world with you, they provide a resting pace to the reader. There is no clamor for the reader's attention - there is just a giving, a sharing of the world of writer's mind. Here that mind is on the surface occupied with Moby Dick and whaling. But that is just the surface. All the talk about whales and people on the boat seems just like the top layer of some  deeper philosophical thought. I say philosophical – the word stands in for anything that connects deeply to the life and world of the reader irrespective of whales, boats or the life one leads. It addresses that deep wonder and question which as humanity we all share consciously or unconsciously at some level, about life, its meanings, its context in this universe, and just how to go about living well, if that provide some meaning. 

Books like these have a richness of a whole world in them, and seem to keep on giving on every reading.  Every encounter is a new encounter – the richness of language, the freshness, the depth. I’ll probably be surprised and delighted afresh on meeting those lines.  And I think of Infinite Jest and the generosity of DFW. I think of War and Peace. Or how I felt after closing Don Quixote. Joys of good writing! 

To anyone who has not read it, and who enjoys reading fiction, this is a book worth spending slow hours on. And to close this post, here sharing Chapter 23 in its brief entirety:

The Lee Shore.

Some chapters back, one Bulkington was spoken of, a tall, newlanded mariner, encountered in New Bedford at the inn.

When on that shivering winter’s night, the Pequod thrust her vindictive bows into the cold malicious waves, who should I see standing at her helm but Bulkington! I looked with sympathetic awe and fearfulness upon the man, who in mid-winter just landed from a four years’ dangerous voyage, could so unrestingly push off again for still another tempestuous term. The land seemed scorching to his feet. Wonderfullest things are ever the unmentionable; deep memories yield no epitaphs; this six-inch chapter is the stoneless grave of Bulkington. Let me only say that it fared with him as with the storm-tossed ship, that miserably drives along the leeward land. The port would fain give succor; the port is pitiful; in the port is safety, comfort, hearthstone, supper, warm blankets, friends, all that’s kind to our mortalities. But in that gale, the port, the land, is that ship’s direst jeopardy; she must fly all hospitality; one touch of land, though it but graze the keel, would make her shudder through and through. With all her might she crowds all sail off shore; in so doing, fights ’gainst the very winds that fain would blow her homeward; seeks all the lashed sea’s landlessness again; for refuge’s sake forlornly rushing into peril; her only friend her bitterest foe!

Know ye now, Bulkington? Glimpses do ye seem to see of that mortally intolerable truth; that all deep, earnest thinking is but the intrepid effort of the soul to keep the open independence of her sea; while the wildest winds of heaven and earth conspire to cast her on the treacherous, slavish shore?

But as in landlessness alone resides highest truth, shoreless, indefinite as God—so, better is it to perish in that howling infinite, than be ingloriously dashed upon the lee, even if that were safety! For worm-like, then, oh! who would craven crawl to land! Terrors of the terrible! is all this agony so vain? Take heart, take heart, O Bulkington! Bear thee grimly, demigod! Up from the spray of thy ocean-perishing—straight up, leaps thy apotheosis!

Tradition and the individual talent

Seamus Heaney in his 'Finders Keepers' talks lovingly and reverentially of T S Eliot. Reminded and inspired, I too spend my hours with Eliot's Collected Poems. And the desire and need to read more from and about Eliot. Looking up 'Joy of Reading', Charles Von Doren suggests reading certain poems and prose by Eliot, esp "Tradition and the Individual Talent". This can be found in 'The Sacred Wood'.Here. 

This essay prompts its own response. A simple one, that is noting this down some lines this post and perhaps reviving this blog.

Some lines from the essay:

Yet if the only form of tradition, of handing down, consisted in following the ways of the immediate generation before us in a blind or timid adherence to its successes, “tradition” should positively be discouraged. We have seen many such simple currents soon lost in the sand; and novelty is better than repetition. Tradition is a matter of much wider significance. It cannot be inherited, and if you want it you must obtain it by great labour. It involves, in the first place, the historical sense, which we may 44call nearly indispensable to anyone who would continue to be a poet beyond his twenty-fifth year; and the historical sense involves a perception, not only of the pastness of the past, but of its presence; the historical sense compels a man to write not merely with his own generation in his bones, but with a feeling that the whole of the literature of Europe from Homer and within it the whole of the literature of his own country has a simultaneous existence and composes a simultaneous order. This historical sense, which is a sense of the timeless as well as of the temporal and of the timeless and of the temporal together, is what makes a writer traditional. And it is at the same time what makes a writer most acutely conscious of his place in time, of his contemporaneity.

No poet, no artist of any art, has his complete meaning alone. His significance, his appreciation is the appreciation of his relation to the dead poets and artists. You cannot value him alone; you must set him, for contrast and comparison, among the dead. I mean this as a principle of aesthetic, not merely historical, criticism. The necessity that he shall conform, that he shall cohere, is not one-sided; what happens when a new work of art is created is something that happens simultaneously to all the works of art which preceded it. The existing monuments form an ideal order among themselves, which is modified by the introduction of the new (the really new) work of art among them. The existing order is complete before the new work arrives; for order to persist after the supervention of novelty, the whole existing order must be, if ever so slightly, altered; 45and so the relations, proportions, values of each work of art toward the whole are readjusted; and this is conformity between the old and the new. Whoever has approved this idea of order, of the form of European, of English literature, will not find it preposterous that the past should be altered by the present as much as the present is directed by the past. And the poet who is aware of this will be aware of great difficulties and responsibilities.

Reading this, a tangential response. From my narrow point of view, this, that considering an artist or writer in a historical chain, is perhaps one way to consider the whole thing. Perhaps other way to look at it is that all great writing resonates with a few simple truths that shine through them in myriad details and complexities. Perhaps there are a few simple truths to begin with, and each great writer discovers again and again the same fountain that feeds all spirit. 

Eliot puts it beautifully in four quartets:

And what there is to conquer
By strength and submission, has already been discovered
Once or twice, or several times, by men whom one cannot hope
To emulate—but there is no competition—
There is only the fight to recover what has been lost
And found and lost again and again: and now, under conditions
That seem unpropitious. But perhaps neither gain nor loss.
For us, there is only the trying. The rest is not our business.

The other problem or conundrum or curiosity or existential matter that he seems to grapple with which finds voice in his poems too is the intersection of temporal with the timeless. A beautiful poem seems to create a timeless space in our temporality. Perhaps the good fortune of finding timelessness in temporality - is the good fortune of any reader.

And again, from Four Quartets:

...But to apprehend

The point of intersection of the timeless

With time, is an occupation for the saint—

No occupation either, but something given

And taken, in a lifetime's death in love,

Ardour and selflessness and self-surrender.

For most of us, there is only the unattended

Moment, the moment in and out of time,

The distraction fit, lost in a shaft of sunlight,

The wild thyme unseen, or the winter lightning

Or the waterfall, or music heard so deeply

That it is not heard at all, but you are the music

While the music lasts. ...

 And further:

What we call the beginning is often the end

And to make an end is to make a beginning.

The end is where we start from. And every phrase

And sentence that is right (where every word is at home,

Taking its place to support the others,

The word neither diffident nor ostentatious,

An easy commerce of the old and the new,

The common word exact without vulgarity,

The formal word precise but not pedantic,

The complete consort dancing together)

Every phrase and every sentence is an end and a beginning,

Every poem an epitaph. And any action

Is a step to the block, to the fire, down the sea's throat

Or to an illegible stone: and that is where we start.

We die with the dying:

See, they depart, and we go with them.

We are born with the dead:

See, they return, and bring us with them.

The moment of the rose and the moment of the yew-tree

Are of equal duration. A people without history

Is not redeemed from time, for history is a pattern

Of timeless moments. So, while the light fails

On a winter's afternoon, in a secluded chapel

History is now and England.

**

Unrelated note. Some books, essays or poems are like verbs. While reading, they seem to create a space which one seems to enter, a state, just the way the words have been threaded together by the poet or the writer. After reading, I don’t seem to remember a lot from them except perhaps sharpening of a sense or some feeling stays which is enveloping. Like a verb then - it is in the act of reading them - the state of reading, rather than any retention of what is read. Perhaps one changes while reading them rather than carry away words from them. As Eliot would perhaps say, the husk of meaning, in changing, fulfilling. If some writings behave like verbs, perhaps Eliot's poems are an atmosphere of their own. 

**

Back to the blog. I hope to read with same verve the crumbs of great writing that come my way; my personal desires are still the same, to prolong my time with such crumbs, by reading on them, around them, about them: the joys and delights of good writing. And hopefully sharing it here. To any kindred with kindled.

Adam and Eve

I recently read Mark Twain's Extracts from Diaries of Adam and Eve, and it is a delightful and fun short read. I got nudged to the book from Ursula K. Le Guin's "The Wave in the mind"  - her book about herself, reading and writing. There is a foreword of sorts to these diaries and so glad that I found them online and read them through. Available here:  Eve's Diary, extracts from Adam's Diary

There are many tangents one can launch (for example, Eve considering herself an experiment), but something I remember it by, is the closing note, Adam at Eve's grave:

"ADAM: Wheresoever she was, THERE was Eden."

And then here's something that summarises the vein in which these diaries are written, how the author regards Adam and Eve, here's an extract from Adam's diary: 

Perhaps I ought to remember that she is very young, a mere girl and make allowances. She is all interest, eagerness, vivacity, the world is to her a charm, a wonder, a mystery, a joy; she can't speak for delight when she finds a new flower, she must pet it and caress it and smell it and talk to it, and pour out endearing names upon it. And she is color-mad: brown rocks, yellow sand, gray moss, green foliage, blue sky; the pearl of the dawn, the purple shadows on the mountains, the golden islands floating in crimson seas at sunset, the pallid moon sailing through the shredded cloud-rack, the star-jewels glittering in the wastes of space—none of them is of any practical value, so far as I can see, but because they have color and majesty, that is enough for her, and she loses her mind over them. If she could quiet down and keep still a couple minutes at a time, it would be a reposeful spectacle. In that case I think I could enjoy looking at her; indeed I am sure I could, for I am coming to realize that she is a quite remarkably comely creature—lithe, slender, trim, rounded, shapely, nimble, graceful; and once when she was standing marble-white and sun-drenched on a boulder, with her young head tilted back and her hand shading her eyes, watching the flight of a bird in the sky, I recognized that she was beautiful.

Both Adam and Eve change and grow in their diaries, and over time, their regard for each other grows as well culminating in that final quote by Adam on Eve and Eden. 

Reading this and thinking, that Adam and Eve, are quite singular characters with no precedents, no one to learn from but each other. They provide such a large imaginary ground to artists. 

That led me to think about where all I have read them referred to in books or poems. So here is opening a list of where I have come across them (this list is quite short at the moment :), will add to this as I come across/ remember more.

• Milton's Paradise Lost
• Diaries of Adam and Eve (links above)
• Robert Frost poem - Never again would birds' song be the same
• This poem on Eve and Serpent - Paul Valery 
• 
  

A wholly new start

So here I am, in the middle way, having had twenty years—
Twenty years largely wasted, the years of l'entre deux guerres
Trying to use words, and every attempt
Is a wholly new start, and a different kind of failure
Because one has only learnt to get the better of words
For the thing one no longer has to say, or the way in which
One is no longer disposed to say it. And so each venture
Is a new beginning, a raid on the inarticulate
With shabby equipment always deteriorating
In the general mess of imprecision of feeling,
Undisciplined squads of emotion. And what there is to conquer
By strength and submission, has already been discovered
Once or twice, or several times, by men whom one cannot hope
To emulate—but there is no competition—
There is only the fight to recover what has been lost
And found and lost again and again: and now, under conditions
That seem unpropitious. But perhaps neither gain nor loss.
For us, there is only the trying. The rest is not our business.

Keats

I recently read a lecture on Mathematics (introductory part of the lecture), delivered by David Hilbert at the turn of last century, a sort of looking back at and looking forward to and gathering some of the biggest unsolved questions or wonders then in Maths. But as did so, he did one of those old-fashioned things, which perhaps finds itself a place in many rituals, and perhaps is a really nice thing generally - that, of recalling to mind. Recalling to mind certain things to bring forth or sort of invoke a frame of mind, a background which lets both the speaker and the listener perhaps orient to or share some of the common frame, the hypothetical thought space where the speaker can then unfold some of his thoughts. Seeing that done beautifully, one wonders why don't we do that more often. Anyway, this practice of recalling to mind, seems to be an age-old thing, as things that endure, generally are strong, and strong generally are beautiful and sensible, and perhaps encapsulate wisdom in practice. Even if the reader is the self, even if it is a note to self recalled often - perhaps just to invoke the companionship of some words.

So here, recalling these words from Keats: 

"As tradesmen say everything is worth what it will fetch, so probably every mental pursuit takes its reality and worth from the ardour of the pursuer—being in itself a Nothing. Ethereal things may at least be thus real, divided under three heads—Things real—things semireal—and nothings. Things real, such as existences of Sun moon and Stars—and passages of Shakspeare.—Things semireal, such as love, the Clouds etc., which require a greeting of the Spirit to make them wholly exist—and Nothings, which are made great and dignified by an ardent pursuit—which, by the by, stamp the Burgundy mark on the bottles of our minds, insomuch as they are able to “consecrate whate’er they look upon.”"

I am relatively new to Keats. Name heard often, a poem or two, but after recently acquiring a poem collection in a second-hand book sale, I seem to come across Keats' words more often. And then as one reads others, and reads Keats again, perhaps something that personally strikes me is a zest, a freshness, a proximity to life - the words that spring highest. Some writers when they write can weave the life around them in their words, so when you open their lines, it is a fragrance fresh from their time, that comes forth and surrounds you. 

I still read Keats. Beginner stages. Just a little read so far. Some poems, a few letters. Poems take a while generally with me. A beginner to poetry in a way. I read a poem and then let the poem pick me up as it would. Sometimes, one finds oneself reading the poem again and again, over days, months. Sometimes, years. Some fragments then become part of you, coming up to converse with you at times as strangers, at times, as yourself. With Keats, it is mostly the life in his words, then, his humility, his perspective, his good sense that his quotes I write here and there on little notes and scraps and some here following too, hoping the words find me again and again.

I scarcely remember counting upon any Happiness—I look not for it if it be not in the present hour,—nothing startles me beyond the moment. The Setting Sun will always set me to rights, or if a Sparrow come before my Window, I take part in its existence and pick about the gravel. 

Words penned some two hundred years ago, can brighten up any reader instantly. Here too, the recalling to mind things simple and basic to turn around any head lost or overwhelmed, a setting to rights.

To a beginner keen to learn more, the joy of hearing a poet's words on poetry is an introductory lesson of sorts, an appreciation of what perhaps the poet appreciates, himself perhaps exploring the shape of his own thoughts on paper as he writes and reads, and writes:

In poetry I have a few axioms, and you will see how far I am from their centre.

1st. I think poetry should surprise by a fine excess, and not by singularity; It should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts, and appear almost a remembrance.

2d. Its touches of beauty should never be half-way, thereby making the reader breathless, instead of content. The rise, the progress, the setting of Imagery should, like the sun, come natural to him, shine over him, and set soberly, although in magnificence, leaving him in the luxury of twilight. But it is easier to think what poetry should be, than to write it—And this leads me to

Another axiom—That if poetry comes not as naturally as the leaves to a tree, it had better not come at all.

I feel, one can perhaps recall to mind things. Or one can recall to mind atmospheres. Some words can help recall to mind states. In the calculus of things, perhaps states are an integration of atmospheres traversing a being. Perhaps that few artists can do, which is an everyday magic of living (a pre and post workout self for example), but in words, only perhaps poets find their way around it. And hence, perhaps prose by poets is one of the best things one can ever read. It has pleasures beyond reading. And hence, this note from Keats. His appreciation of the transformation that happens on encounter with a waterfall, "I live in the eye".

What astonishes me more than any thing is the tone, the coloring, the slate, the stone, the moss, the rock-weed; or, if I may so say, the intellect, the countenance of such places. The space, the magnitude of mountains and waterfalls are well imagined before one sees them; but this countenance or intellectual tone must surpass every imagination and defy any remembrance. I shall learn poetry here and shall henceforth write more than ever, for the abstract endeavor of being able to add a mite to that mass of beauty which is harvested from these grand materials, by the finest spirits, and put into etherial existence for the relish of one’s fellows. I cannot think with Hazlitt that these scenes make man appear little. I never forgot my stature so completely – I live in the eye; and my imagination, surpassed, is at rest.

At times, words obscure. At times, words reveal or illuminate. Generally a poet's words reveal. They illuminate the subject touched, they reveal the poet's world, ways, thoughts and approach to life, and perhaps, inadvertently, they reveal the poet. Poets are integrators that way, artists of words, their words seem to be very close to the fount of their own lives, often spanning the breadth and depth of living in a few words.

Perhaps a poet's words are like a concurring hum or a variation on a theme, a music, which, in a various way, repeat the same fount close to the poet, the fount of its own living, just another way to see or say the same thing, a new rejoicing in the approach to the only fount one knows. Perhaps.